Rant-a-palooza!

Some Observances.

The Mens Bathroom: Why the hell do guys piss on the floor? How does that happen? We can aim! Worse than that, someone shit on the seat in one of the stalls. I don't even want to think about how that happened.

While I was on break I found myself listening to the most ghettolicious of conversations. The gag was..they were white girls. It escapes me as to why these johnson county white girls feel the undying need to talk ghetto. It conflicts with their prada bags and DG sunglasses. Another thing about these girls; Why do they all look and dress alike? Is there a store at Oak Park Mall called "fake ass white bitch" where they buy these 'daddies money' uniforms?

On the topic of Johnson County. Where the hell did these people learn how to drive? They want to get on their SUVs and Large trucks like their sports cars, but then drive super slow in the fast lane. I hate the downtown loop at rush our. Mixing Missouri and Kansas drivers together is like watching Nascar take on a bunch of retarded kids on big wheels. Its sad.

I wonder if my neighbor will ever speak instead of just starring at me while he smokes.

My friends are a bit odd. They don't seem to have time for me anymore. That's ok. Little do they know I have a life now. I found a great bargin on a life at walmart. I know why I couldnt find it! It was hidden, nestled between the tampons and the vagisil.

I was informed last night I have never had a taco. Fucking Taco Johns. Lying bastards. I thought the super taco bravo was authentic!

Just because I am Jewish does not mean I like Jerry Seinfeld. Infact, I hate that asshole. He is the reason there are hate crimes among jews. Him and that nervous little prick Woody allen.

Why can't Ex's just let it the frack go? Seriously. It's over. Move on with your life. My ex wife and my girlfriends ex husband are the most obsessive people I know. I know we are wonderful people, and if you idiots would have treated us better you wouldnt be ex's now would you?!

The world would be a better place if twitter would eat itself.

The white girl that sits across from me annoys me. Shes a redneck girl that says holla all the time.

Why do gay people have a better sense of style than I do? Paolas friend dresses so much better than me.

Why is it impossible for people to keep their promises? If you cant or wont do it then dont say you will!

and finally.....

Jarred gives me free coffee at the gas station he works at. Thats pretty awesome.

Thanks for reading.

The Masorti